Prayer. Changes. Me.

As I log into the site here tonight and while I ponder where the Holy Spirit will take us to, all that I can see in my mind and in my heart are three words. Prayer. Changes. Me.

"Therefore, humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your cares upon Him, for He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:6-7

Prayer has become one of the sweetest adventures of my life. I believe with all my heart that prayer really does change things. Prayer has changed me. As I praise God, my burdens are lifted. The burdens themselves may not change, but they're transferred from my shoulders to God's. As I unload my worries and my cares on Him, I can almost sense His presence and strength with me. As I confess my sins, I know He forgives me.

As a woman, who is also a daughter, sister, wife, mother, friend, co-worker, believer... I know that I cannot fullfill all of these roles and fill all of these shoes alone. I rely heavily on Him for guidance and faithfulness. In the big moments as well as the small.

Just recently I was talking to my mom on the telephone and I was in tears. I was emotional at the fact that I sometimes feel as though I am having to read God's mind. Have you ever felt that way? I often become anxious at the fact that expanding our family is so non-traditional. We are not the "norm." We are faced with decisions to make and difficult ones at that.  I am okay with not being the "norm", but I often try and sit back and guess where He will take us next. I should say, that with time, prayer, and healing I am okay with not being the "norm." There is anything I would give to be able to have a healthy baby with my husband, naturally. But I am placing my trust in Him, and choosing to believe that He has a plan and a purpose for us.

I explained to my mom that I know that thus far in my life's story that I have not written the story, He has. There has been times that I thought I was writing it, only to find out that I surely wasn't. He was and is.

We talked in detail about the chapters of life we have read and lived thus far.  About how amazing they are and how we never would have included all the added details to the story, but now that we have read it and know it, it is all good and makes sense. We reflected on the emotions of when you are in the middle of a chapter and anticipating what is about to come. As well as when you are about to turn a page and to keep your eyes open and your heart eager!

As we ended our phone call that day I prayed. And again, prayer changed me. I had this peace come to me. This peace that I could feel in my heart. It is a peace that I have come to know. I choose to believe that I will cast all my cares over to Him, for He cares for me and will lead us into the next chapter. :) Prayers appreciated always.

Blessings.

Sarah